I went to see The Shape of Water a couple of weeks ago at the super comfy Everyman in Chelmsford, and couldn’t stop thinking about it, so I did a weird thing for me and made some fan art. Maybe I just haven’t liked a film/ tv show/ book/ game enough to make art about it until now…
This was made using the Procreate app on my iPad Pro. I bought my iPad Pro & apple pencil a couple of years ago now and it has honestly taken me that long to even vaguely get to grips with drawing digitally. I do find it a million times better than using one of those drawing tablets without a screen though – my brain couldn’t not look at the tablet while I was drawing (derp).
I have no idea if I’m doing anything “right” still (I mean, there’s not a “right” way to make art, but ya know what I mean), but this is the first piece I’ve been happy with. I definitely think I’m getting my preferred process down, but I’m still figuring out brushes and how to make them look “natural”. Coming from a background of using physical paint etc to create art, its kind of frustrating that I can’t make things look like that yet. Keeping my fingers crossed that Kyle’s Brushes come out with a set for procreate!
Drawing is a struggle for me, it has been, probably, for the last few years. I couldn’t think for the life of me why, as drawing and painting has always been one of the biggest parts of who I am. Then I watched a recent video from MAIS2, and saw one of those usually annoying “meaningful quotes” (barf) that stuck with me and all of a sudden it made sense!
I think A) I’m scared and therefore procrastinating and B) I’m just not enjoying the process anymore.
By scared, I mean as soon as I pick up a pencil I automatically tell myself that whatever I create is going to be terrible and not up to the standard of my favourite illustrators. So whats the point?? The only people who tell me they like my drawings are my family and close friends; does that mean they are just saying it to be nice? I never sell anything on my Etsy shop; should I just give up? – I’m trying to silence this damaging voice, but sometimes its overwhelming, so my fear turns in to procrastination. I end up cleaning the kitchen or doing something that really can wait, instead of getting my head down and practising.
Even though I have spent the last few years experimenting with style and different mediums, I just don’t enjoy the process anymore. It took a long time for me to discover that was what was wrong with me, and its difficult to accept, but its true. Now that I know thats what it is, I can at least get to the bottom of why and try to fix it (right??). It might have a lot to do with the fact that I put too much pressure on myself (CONSTANTLY) – this is probably mostly caused by social media, specifically Instagram. I start to question if I am skilled enough while surrounded by all of these talented people all over the world at my fingertips, who have made something of themselves, and quickly decide I’m not.
So, what I’m trying to say is – my aim is to find out how I can quash these fears and just get on with it and create without beating myself up. I can only improve with practise, and the more I create the more creative my processes and themes will become. So perhaps, hopefully, you will be seeing more “sketchbook” posts with updates on how I’m feeling about creating. Does anyone else struggle with these sorts of feelings when it comes to creativity? How do you carry on and stop yourself from freezing up?
(these sketches are from the past couple of months, some are digital and some are pencil/pen/marker on paper)
Hello everyone! This year I’m going to be participating in Inktober!
For those who don’t know, Inktober is a drawing challenge that goes on throughout October. The aim is to use ink to draw something every day. EVERY DAY. I realise this is going to be a real challenge for me, as I am 👑procrastination queen👑, but I feel like I NEED this right now. I’m at the tail end of a serious dose of art block, I can feeeeel it, and this is something that might help me immensly. Or turn me in to a pile of inky mush. We’ll see. For more info on Inktober, click here.
At the end of this challenge I’d really like to get a very limited number of books printed of everything I’ve drawn during the challenge to sell, and that’s where Patreon comes in! Patreon is a website that allows people to support creators to grow and continue working regularly. As a supporter you will receive little treats from me, in the form of discounts, previews of prints & originals before they go live anywhere else, the occasional video and maybe even little packages!
A couple of sketches done on my Ipad from the last few days. I’ve been having really weird dreams lately and I think that fact is seeping its way in to my drawings. Knowing what to do with backgrounds or when to add them in has always been hard for me. I think I need to push myself with them a bit more, it would defintely make my illustrations more interesting!